It has been a busy few weeks. I lived and worked in Washington D.C. for three weeks and have just sat down to process my experience. I know that is a funny sentence because we are constantly processing and overthinking the mundane details of life.
But they aren't really mundane. In truth, they are wonderful.
I was an intern, of little consequence to the office I worked for. I know this is true, I'm not seeking humility in writing that. I was a quiet observer, but I learned a great deal.
I went in hopes of crossing off another internship from my list, I wanted to experience and move on. Like I always do, I went in thinking I knew what to expect. And if I'm honest, I expected a lot of what happened. I learned a great deal about government and what it means to navigate a large city mostly alone. But I also learned something that I didn't expect and did not go looking for.
I saw my need for Jesus. I saw the possibilities for jobs opening up, my horizons literally broadening and I was scared. I saw desires fall away and new ones form. New doubts and new dreams.
Maybe I can do something in a big city, maybe that is what God has for me. Or maybe it isn't. I was humbled by seeing the expanse of His plan and the ignorance I have had for seeking to know it. I can seek to follow it, but I learned to stop making His plan mine. I want His plan for my life, but now I see the need to want it in His time.
Not yes God, but my desires first. Instead, yes God, but match my desires to your's.
So I learned a lot about government, but even more about the one who governs my life. He tells me His is present and active, but I am always surprised. I'm thankful that He doesn't give up on my doubting heart.
"I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." Philippians 4:12-13